How to find balance and peace and be authentic

 Balance is about peace and fairness

A state where all elements have been considered; all the different facts and opinions and feelings.

There are three distinct areas in our lives where balance can be of use:

• our inner world
• family relations
• the society around us, be it politics in the office or government

 

Our inner world

It is so important that we are in peace with ourselves

I strongly feel the need to be in peace with myself, in my effort to be good to others.

• I want to eat the cake, but be thin as well
• I want to party all the time, but read all the books as well
• I want to have a killer career, but never get out of bed
• I also want a super healthy body, but never set foot in the gym

Easy, huh?

It took me years of conflict, to realise that yes, I can have it all. We can have it all; it’s all about balance. Give and take.

Stay in bed longer during weekends and not every day. Eat cake ever so often and not with each meal, visit the dreaded gym twice a week, and not every day. Read the self development book with all the wonderful tips about time management – even if it is for 15 min in the evening. By the way, 15min is still more than nothing!

Wouldn’t it be great if we could be in peace with our inner demons and the unfulfilled dreams and expectations we all deal with. Let’s just be realistic for a moment, understand and respect our own choices that led us to where we are today.

All we want is to be better isn’t it?

Relationships

Let’s think now about finding balance with regard to our close family relationships. Get over the past, focus on the present moment and find common ground with parents, children, and spouse.

My mother is never going to be the tender loving soul that hugs me all the time, but I can see now that she loves me in her own way.

My children are not going to follow my every instruction, but it’s also useful that they make their own mistakes, they have their own experiences.

As with the relationship with my husband … well he is probably never going to be the extrovert that brings me flowers and declares his devotion daily.

And it’s OK!

We need to explore the middle ground that leaves enough room for both sides to breathe and maintain their self-respect.

By all means, set a boundary but be equally prepared to respect the individuality of the other person – even if you gave birth to this person!

Outer world

It is also important to find balance in our relations with others, along the lines of office politics and even government politics. I know it is difficult sometimes, but it is imperative that we listen.

Listen to the different opinion, the strange idea, the far-fetched scenario. It takes patience and sometimes constraint but it’s necessary to listen.

I listen full of hope that the other person will then listen to me as well. Only then can we find common ground, or a common purpose, common parameters of any kind that will enable us to agree to a solution, a plan, a mutually beneficial consensus.

Finale

In order to be very honest, I would also like to add this:

I cannot really decide which is more difficult:  Peace with ourselves or peace with the others?

Peace inside would probably be a good starting point, I think.

Finding the right balance is something very important to me because I believe that this can help us avoid conflict, and elicit good relationships. It can promote progress and the synthesis of new ideas.

I wanted to write about this so we can all share this idea, and work together on finding balance and harmony in our lives.

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I would like to thank LH ‘Daisy’ Johnson for reviewing the original form of this post, and offering valuable suggestions for it’s improvement.